Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Sappy kid post...

My kids..
So many of you know that David and Jennifer are my step-kids.  They were from my previous marriage, but I hope that this blog helps people to understand that blood is so unimportant in the feeling of family.

The first time I met David he was five and Jenn was two.  David came running into the living room when his father and I were working on a school video project.  He was missing his front four upper teeth, and was just the most gorgeous kid.  He was tiny for five, and had a sweet sing song voice.  He was wearing a little blue stripped long sleeve shirt.  I'm not sure why I remember that other than it was love at first sight.  The way he said "daddy" melted my heart, and at that moment I thought "this man is raising his two children and they have such a great relationship."  - - It's interesting what you find out over time, but this isn't to undercut the relationship my ex has with his kids.

Jennifer had cute little chubby cheeks and little budda like belly.  She had blonde hair, and her eyes were so blue.  I can honestly say, I didn't want kids or even like them, until I met this babies.  Jennifer and I seemed to connect only through looks at first, I couldn't understand anything her two year old mouth said, but Dave could.  I'd say "what, honey?" and David would say..."she said,...."  It went on like that for nearly a year.  He could understand her, but to me she was speaking gibberish.

I remember when we were married, and he was working in Lafayette, he'd leave, and I'd hear the pitter patter of little feet coming down the hall..first it was David and he'd jump in bed with me, and then Jenn would quickly follow.  Those kids were my everything; suddenly it was like I knew my purpose in life was to be their mommy.  I'm not saying any of this to hurt anyone, btw...I'm just saying it because it was so real.  They felt like mine, but something was missing.  For a while, I had them completely, but every now and then they'd leave to go visit another mommy, and I remember standing at the dryer and crying and smelling clothing, because I longed for them so much.  That was when I made a conscious decision; I needed one that I wasn't going to have to share. Zacheriah was the product of that decision. He was born too early and way too small, but not that you could tell any of that now.

The older two are adults now and Zach a teen, but I can honestly say that I love them all so much. I was truly blessed and am so thankful to have each of them. I wish everyone had three just like them, so they could feel the joy they have brought to me.

Feeling a little sentimental as I wait for the tanning room to free up.

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