Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Times and reviews

these are FANTASTIC cooking utensils and one of my Christmas presents from Gary.  The handles are weighted so that you do not have to have something to lay the end on.  They're great and create less of a mess.

Second - started watching the first series of Doctor Who today because of +tommy graham and @lylly sandifur and +Jennifer Shoop.  I must say..still not impressed.  I'm only 4 episodes in, and maybe it'll get better, but I'm still not SOLD on it yet.

The bed (Temurpedic Cloud) is growing on me, slowly.  Once I finally get to sleep, I don't feel like I want to get out of it.

The last week or so has been hectic and oh so much fun.  I have a GREAT family and Great friends.  It was fantastic that Jenn was here and that Zach was with us mostly.  We had a great get together with Gary's family and with my own.  I love you all.

I'd talk about the Job hunt, and there is opportunity on the horizon but I do NOT want to jinx it.  I'll wait a bit and will let you all know when something is SURE.


Tuesday, December 18, 2012

okay people - BE REAL -

No one thinks it is a stupid idea to put guns in the schools where are children are.  I see on the news tonight that Indy is thinking about arming administrators and teachers...REALLY?
Can anyone see a child maybe finding out where one of these guns are and getting his hands on it?  Can anyone think of a better idea?  geezz...How about we realize that tragedy happens?  I realize that while all of the tragedy is here and schools need to be protected don't we think maybe we have to do it in a way that truly protects...I feel like when something bad happens in our nation we over react to the max and it just makes crazy criminals think "yeah, if I get mad enough I could do this . . . "
Please stop helping criminals.  Lets sit back and think for a while.  I heard the other night that this teacher was thinking her son needed help and she was frightened by him for a LONG time, maybe we should make sure that teachers have better access to help avenues when they see depression happening with students and with family members.  Maybe we could work on some sort of tragedy alarm that sounds so loud the entire town would hear it.  Maybe we could come up with some sort of restraint or massive sticky slime that comes out of the ceiling if a trigger is hit..and everyone gets stuck immediately...Lets stop thinking of other dangerous weapons that could create another tragedy.  Maybe we could create panic rooms for each classroom....I think my mind isn't near as good as lots of people, but GUNS>>>>really lets add to the school exactly what takes lives from it......Where is the LOGIC here...NO NO NO
I haven't been really vocal on a lot of this, but COME on...I do not want the teachers in my sons school to have guns..I do not want guns around him at I get that everyone knows right now that I am not a republican, but GEEZZZ people..these are our babies...I don't want a weapon like that near my child, and I will NOT be okay with it if it happens.  I also will not be quite about it.

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Love and feel fully. . .

Yesterday was a good day.  A nice all day party for sure.  Thanks to everyone who joined us for the celebration.  Any excuse to have a party is great.

Today we go to celebrate one of my best friends birthdays.  She has to know that she is one of my best friends on earth too.  I'm excited too because we were asked to next weekend go see The Hobbit.  Yay! and Jenn will be home Yay! again, and Zach will be here for that too...I only have to still miss David for the holiday's.

I think Shawshank Redemption is one of my favorite movies.  And now you're wondering why I said that.  Gary turned it on just a few min ago, and it's hard to stay focused.

Okay time for a poem.  Said I wouldn't post more of them, but whatevs.  I want to.

Love isn't a strong enough word
What happened to yesterday
So much time has passed

The first moment I knew
You needed me and I you
The sun was brighter after

16 years has gone by
I still need you
Even when your need for me
is a distant memory

Do you remember playing in the rain
Hot chocolate on the cold days
Snuggling up on the couch
Learning about life together

There were so many things to teach
Letters written to look like bugs
catching softballs and running bases
A hug a day keeps evil away

Who knew a couple little ones
Could teach so much so quickly
Who knew I'd fall in love so completely
I suppose the universe knew

To really love is so important
Blood is not what makes family
Listening before action
Feel as fully as possible

I learned that today will slip
Tomorrow will be here soon
You can't get back to now
So enjoy every second

I love you, my children

You know what I really like.  I like that we're all on this ball learning together at the same time.  Old and young alike.  Everyday is something new and different and we're all messing up together a lot.

Happy Days!  Most important in life is experiences.  Enjoy them.

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Winter Feelings. . . Love and Loss

When I was 18 years old, I felt my first real loss ever.  At that point all of my Great-Grandparents had passed away, but for me, they were old, and I never connected so much with them.  I grew up next door to my first cousin, and he was really one of my best friends.  He and the guy that lived across the road.  They were my best friends for sure growing up.
We transformed while watching Transformers together, built forts in the woods, collected buckets of sand to fill in pot holes (ridiculous), chewed up worms for baby birds together, threw rocks at his mom, got caught with matches, got hurt together, smoked together, drown a cat together (really more innocent than it sounds - we were five and didn't know that cats couldn't swim), and got into trouble by grandma together.
When our family lost Shawn, we lost a lot.  Life changed forever during that time.  I know that sometimes say things like that but don't mean it, but for our family the hole in our hearts never really mended.  Nothing ever felt the same after that day in May.  I learned that we weren't invincible and that life was going to end for everyone, and even though I had known it before that day, nothing makes it more real than losing someone so close to you and in such a tragic way.
My kids are now the age Shawn was when he died...I wish I could make everything easy for them, and that they wouldn't have to feel the sadness that accompanies tragic loss.  The unfortunate truth is that death is a part of it, and we all feel the loss even when people say, "they're in a better place"...That still means they're in a different place than you are, and so it still hurts and it's hard, but day by day..the hurt lessens.  I've had the privileged of knowing a few people in my life that seem to think that burying emotion about loss is somehow handling it better than others.  I think that crying is okay and healthy, I think that feeling fully is the only way to get through what you are going through..I think that you should handle loss however you need to for you to feel it and move on to the next day....
Recently I made something special for my family for Christmas.  It included a lot of sappy stuff that brought back tons of memories and definitely some tears.  Gary said, "why do you do this to yourself?" of course he doesn't get it, but I like to remember and to feel sometimes, I'm not letting it take over my life, but sometimes it's okay to feel sad that I have lost some of the most important people in my life.
And why am I thinking of sad stuff so close to Christmas...well...this is the time of year that has been very sad for me in the past...Maybe even my greatest loss.

Anyway...just rambling..sometimes I do that..

Going tonight to watch some beautiful kids perform at our Winter Showcase...Yay!! Love the LBBT.

I love you all.  Have a smiley evening.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012


It's nice to hear the sunrise and the sunset.  I know that seems silly to some of you, but some of you probably get what I'm talking about.  I sure enjoy those days when I take in those sounds.

Today I heard the sunrise.  Today I will hear the sunset.  It has been a good day.  A very good day.  I will figure everything out, and it is so nice to not have to figure it all out alone.  I live with two of my best friends in all the world and they do tend to make my days brighter than I could imagine.

Last night a friend invited us to the opening "Friends and Family" night for Arni's in Frankfort...It was nice, I love being a friend of Arni's.  Tonight I'm going to Ulen Country Club to watch some Black Box Kids perform.  Exciting stuff.  Thursday night is our showcase for this session.  The Black Box is an unexpected blessing; those kids are so wonderful (and parents too).

So - Got my final grades for all of my classes - A average - that's nice..Saturday an open house which should be nice also..Thanks to Gary for loving me so much.  He's alright that guy of mine.

Oh by the way...we're gonna have a baby...

Got Zombie's U for Zach for christmas (well me really).  He had a sad Saturday so we opened it and got scared.  It's a GREAT scary game.

Yeah, I was kidding about the baby thing, just seeing who was reading..

Later beautifuls..make sure you listen to the sunrises and sunsets and see what you hear...k..

Have a FABULOUS night.  I will.

Saturday, December 8, 2012


I sure love my boys..
How did it happen that Zach can make me laugh so hard that drink could come out my nose.. The boy is funny and sweet.. I think I am doing okay somehow with him.
We laughed for 10 minutes when these two ladies asked to help us take pictures and I told the it was okay cuz we were playing.. Trying to line up the huge tree in the middle of us was interesting and fun..
Wreck it Ralph was good.. And i have to say.. To have a kid like zach like me... Makes me think I might not be that bad... So everyone knows.. That was in reference to the last line in the movie.. Not because I believe I'm a bad person..

Anyway.. I liked the dreary day.. Kept expecting to see zombies on the streets.. Not sure why.. I expect that will be a dreary day too.

I did feel a little bad for Zach today. He was looking forward to Adrian spending the night.. We found out this afternoon that wasn't going to happen and he got a little upset.. I told him to call his uncle to ask him to come over.. He did and Roy had plans.. But zach even though he was down.. He stayed very unwhiny about it.. He's growing up nicely.. Very proud of him so I gave him an early Christmas present.. Zombie U... Freaky game.

Enuf.. Good night..