Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Full day memories . . .

I think it's weird when there are days that you can remember so clearly like they happened yesterday.  Those types of days are very few also.

I remember and can replay the entire event of finding out my cousin had died in a car crash.
I remember and can replay the events leading up to the emergency c-section and having Zach.
I remember the day that David first called me Mom and how uncertain I was that I could be a Mom to anyone.  I love you David.  I wish I still felt like you loved me.
I remember the day I found out that my Gma had cancer and was most likely not going to live through it.
I remember Sept. 11th, 2001 from morning until evening.

Sept 11th, 2001 - Zach was almost 2, and he and I were home together.  I switched on the TV, as I was walking through the living room, and saw a breaking news flash.  I sat down and watched as the second plane hit live.  I couldn't believe my eyes.  My dad was laid-off from work during this time, and I called him.  He said he was coming over, and there was such sadness in his voice.  While I was waiting on him to arrive, I called Pleasant Hill elementary where both David and Jennifer were in attendance.  I remember the lady explaining to me that they were in Lock-down and that meant no one in and no one out.  My heart was probably beating a million miles a minute, while I demanded access to my children to no avail.  My dad arrived and talked sense in me, as we watched the TV coverage.  It felt like no matter how many times and how much coverage there was, I could not get enough.  It was like the biggest national tragedy was unfolding right before our eyes.  I went to the school, and I apparently was not alone in the anger that our children weren't accessible.  They released early, and I got to bring home a couple of kids that had watched too much without a Mommy at the school. In hindsight, I understand what they were thinking, it was just something I wish the kids could have been with me through.  It's not as if I could have explained it any better than the school did.

I remember feeling bad that I was happy that my family was safe.  I remember crying and praying for families  and hugging mine.

Thanks to the Firefighters.
Thanks to the Military.  Thanks to my David and his Wife, Amber.
Thanks to the Police.
Thanks to Everyone that works to protect and keep us safe.

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