Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Relationships, my thoughts

Often times people blur the lines between reality and fiction.  Actually this happens for so many reasons.  I think some people chose fiction because it's easier to deal with.  I know that I sometimes do.
It would be nice to be able to just have everything "your" way, but it doesn't work that way when you have responsibilities and other people to think about.  When someone is no longer "in Love" with you, which happens all the time, you should be able to let them go.  You need to love them enough to say, "okay, be free of me."  I do understand that hurts and it's so much easier said than done.  I believe that there are so many "right" choices out there for you, not just the one and only.  People fall in love and they fall apart and out of love.  I know that sometimes you find a special someone that changes and grows with you, and you can decide to stay in love with them and your fondness for them grows.  This does not mean that they will always give you good vibrations, but that you will adore and love them through it all.  But there are other things that can happen...As a person matures and grows in their own life and decisions, they can decide that you are maybe not growing the same way as them.  They can decide that while they still have fond feelings and memories of you, that they no longer have the being "in love" feelings with you.  This doesn't make them a bad person; it just means that they don't want to hurt you and they still love you, but not romantically any longer.
 I think it's important to talk about how many options are out there for people.  Attraction is a great thing, and every person has a lot of people that they can connect with.  Sometimes you find a few people that have a greater connection to you than the person  you are currently with.  It does not make a person bad, if they feel some sort of attraction towards someone else, we are human. Shoot when I was 18, I was attracted to all kinds of guys, and I'm pretty certain it was because I didn't know who I was yet.  As I've gotten older, the attraction has changed.  I am specific about the kinds of people that are attractive to me.  Like George Clooney and Matt Damon (only in We bought a zoo) for instance, I am attracted to them.
I used to be scared that Gary would some day fall out of love with me.  I used to worry that what happened between my ex-husband and I would happen with Gary too..Like someday I would just wake up and be repulsed by him, but that would never happen.  I truly love him, and if ever I fall out of love with him, I will expect him to let me go without a fight, because he's that mature.  I will also expect that he will always love and have fond feeling towards me.
This blog wasn't written towards Gary, I do love him and am still "in love" with him.

1 comment:

Tommy said...

I agree with most of that. However, it does make me wonder where your inspiration came from.

Another thing on the topic: Fifty years ago and before, when most of the American ideals were born, there weren't many options for love. People learned to love each other and stayed together for completely different reasons than they do today.

I have no idea what the rules are supposed to be now, or even how much more difficult it is to find someone you love. I'll let you know when I figure it out though.

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