Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Explanations

This message is to a few specific people in my life.  I know there are things that are not understood.  I know that money is more important to you than me.  I know that you think you should be most important all of the time. I am sorry for you.  I feel like everyone keeps asking for explanations for stupid things.  I DO NOT love one kid more than another.  I love all of my kids differently.

It is interesting to me though that the people that say this say it for the reasons of money and equality of THINGS.  The way that I feel towards David is much different than the way I feel towards Jennifer.  As soon as David moved and he stopped taking calls from me and even stopped visiting very often, David chose to ignore me and chose to hardly even text back when I was the one paying for his phone.  David has also always been a person that thinks he's entitled like I owe him something.  Even though I didn't give birth to him and I was the one transferring money into his account in college and sending him LOTS of gift cards when I didn't have to.  He has always acted like I should do more for him even when he gave nothing back.  I made sure we went to his graduation from basic training, even when his father did not, I made sure that I paid money on his new laptop even though I gave nothing to anyone else that day.  I have always been there for all of them, and yet, he gets jealous over a "supposed graduation present" for his sister.  Don't take into account that maybe just maybe I am doing better financially now than when he graduated from high school, or maybe just maybe this trip wasn't EVEN for Jennifer.  Say what you will, but this trip was for ZACH and he wanted to have Jenn go with us.  And why does Zach think of Jenn before David, OH yeah, because she has been around when his brother has mostly not. I would also like to say that David received a HD TV/DVD combo, a laptop (even though it wasn't brand new) and a $500 dollar voucher that he could cash in as he made money over the summer (we were matching up to $500 of anything he earned that summer - which he did NOTHING with) - Funny though how he only remembers the TV.  Again this is because he feels as though he's entitled.  A while back he sat in my living room talking about his younger sister, Alexis' grandmother Alice, and he said how horrible she was because she bought things for Alexis and his other sister Cheyenne but not for him.  She doesn't know him, but of course, there should be equality EVERYWHERE.  Well GROW up.

Grow up all of you..and you all know who you are.  Jennifer is 18 and David is 20.  Realize that I will always be there for both of them, and I don't plan on that changing.  Stop acting like everything I do for Jennifer is so bad or I have some other reason for doing things than the fact that I love her.  She's a good young woman, and like it or not, I have something to do with that.  I have tried to explain this to her, but I'm not sure she gets it.  A person's heart is big enough to love everyone, and she shouldn't have to choose one over the other.  She actually thinks I hate you, but she's wrong...I hate what you do to her.  She feels like she has to play this game all the time, and I am so OVER it.  I love her, and I want her to be happy.  Can you all say the same?  I do not expect her to ever love you less, so stop pushing that somehow if she loves me that I'm taking your place.  I don't really understand how a parent does not understand that love is different between each child and that each child has to be handled differently.  Why push equality, it does not work that way?

Hey David - I love you..what I got Jennifer was actually 2 concerts for her graduation.  I didn't get her the trip for that and it was Zach's trip.  He wanted her to go, so we took her.  I am very disappointed in you for your reaction to that.  You're an adult, so act like one.  I will always love you, but you're an adult married man now, so you need to really step up and stop acting like a child.

This WILL be my only EXPLANATION for any of this EVER.

1 comment:

Tommy said...

Love you, Jess.

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